Name Changing

Category: Let's talk

Post 1 by Eleni21 (I have proven to myself and the world that I need mental help) on Saturday, 07-Nov-2009 10:34:58

I'm wondering if any of you on here have changed your name legally due to something other than marriage, civil union etc or forced change via immigration? If so, in what country do you live and how difficult was it to do? How long did you wait before actually starting the process to make it legal? How did your family and friends react when you told them? Do some still call you by your birth name? Did you find it difficult to travel internationally or to get your general paper work straightened out?

The reason I ask this is because I've always wanted to change my name. I've never liked my first name Tiffany. Tiffanitsa was a cute little way of getting by with it but it's a dominutive and certainly not appropriate legally. I've known for awhile now that I really love the name Eleni. It's ancient/sacred (think Hellen of Troy) and relates directly to being Greek (Greece is Hellas/Ellada, a Greek man is an Ellinas and a Greek woman is an Ellinida). The problem was choosing a last name, since my current one wouldn't sound right to me and has been ruined by members of the family with whom we don't associate. So after some serious deliberation, I settled upon the name Vamvakari. It comes from Markos Vamvakaris, my favourite singer/musician who's been a huge inspiration to me over the last six years. I'd drop the s at the end cause I'm a woman. To me, it's a great honour to carry his name.

anyway, I've been going by Eleni since December of 2008, just to see how I like it and feel that this truly is the right step for me. it empowers me and makes me feel good about my self, like I can do almost anything within reason. My friends and boyfriend all call me that, but my family insists on calling me by my birthname. I guess I could understand that one in the case of my immediate family. What's worse, now my little nieces and nephews are learning to call me Aunt Tiffany. And of course, I still have to use my legal name when applying for jobs etc. I looked up the requirements and steps to changing your name in New Jersey and they're not that difficult. I even found a place that, for a small fee, wil help me fill out the forms. But my aunt told me that even without a lawyer, it'll cost about $1,000 and right now, I'm pretty much broke. Anyway, yeah. Just curious. Btw, I want to change my username on here but this is the last time I can do it. I'm trying to decide between Magkisa83 (one that I use all over), Eleni83, Elenaki (dominutine/affectionate again) or simply Eleni. Since we have Quicknotes here, it's often that people get called by their usernames and I figured putting my new name into my username would be cool but not sure.

Post 2 by Blondie McConfusion (Blah Blah Blah) on Saturday, 07-Nov-2009 15:30:25

i changed my last name when i turned 18. i changed it to my mom's maiden name. the only cost i had was a small lawyer fee and court costs. it was about 200 bucks or so. if you can figure out how to file yourself, you don't need the lawyer.

Post 3 by Eleni21 (I have proven to myself and the world that I need mental help) on Saturday, 07-Nov-2009 16:00:14

I actually plan on going with a site that offers two services for name change. The First costs
$39 and you download the forms and fill them out yourself. But I think that would be a bit difficult and confusing for me, first cause I'd need help to do it and second cause I don't understand all of these things. the second, service, which I'll most likely be using, costs $79 and they'll fill them out for you and make sure things are
done properly. It can be found here.
http://www.the-law-store.com/docprepser1.html
I also found a site which explains how to change your name in New Jersey.  Aside
from the cost of posting to the newspaper twice and sending out the
various paperwork to federal and other places, there are also the court fees which can cost about $200, if I remember correctly. I estimated it all to $381, if I don't qualify for the waver, so I donno where my aunt came up with $1,000 but she seemed sure of herself and did work for a lawyer for a time.
http://www.lsnjlaw.org/english/courts/formslawsuits/changename/changenamenj/
Maybe, things have changed and it really is cheaper now. I sure hope so.

Post 4 by Geek Woman (Owner and Founder of Waldorf PC) on Saturday, 07-Nov-2009 22:37:25

check out www.legalzoom.com A friend introduced me ot the site, and it has forms for just about anything. i hope that this helps you.

Post 5 by LeoGuardian (You mean there is something outside of this room with my computer in it?) on Saturday, 07-Nov-2009 22:45:45

Good luck with this. I don't know why they would charge so much for a name change. I paid 60 bucks 15 years ago for a marriage license. I guess maybe name changes are rarer. At one time I had thought to change mine to go by my middle name but never went through with it. This is obviously a serious issue for you, to which you've put a lot of thought, so I hope you get a lot of local support.

Post 6 by Eleni21 (I have proven to myself and the world that I need mental help) on Saturday, 07-Nov-2009 22:48:05

Thanks. *hug* I have put a great deal of thought into it and it does mean alot. On a lighter note, what about my name on here?

Post 7 by Shadow_Cat (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Saturday, 07-Nov-2009 23:39:14

Hi, Eleni. Iv'e never considered chaning my name, but I have a friend that did it. If I can get a hold of her, I will ask her how she went about her. She only changed her first name, not her full one.

As to your user name here, I'd go with just Eleni, or Eleni83. I addressed you as such on this board because it's how you seem to want to be addressed, and if that's what you want, that's how i'll call you whenever I talk to you on the site, too. Good luck with all of this, and keep us posted!

Post 8 by Eleni21 (I have proven to myself and the world that I need mental help) on Saturday, 07-Nov-2009 23:44:59

Thanks for the respect, the help and the greeting. I truly appreciate it and would be interested in hearing what your friend has to say if you can find her. I know each state is different but at least it'll give me a perspective.

Post 9 by Shadow_Cat (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Sunday, 08-Nov-2009 6:30:29

God, my typing in my previous post sucked. Sorry about that. Yeah, my friend lives in Iowa, so the legal stuff would be different, but like I say, if I can get a hold of her, I'll ask about it.

Post 10 by BryanP22 (Novice theriminist) on Sunday, 08-Nov-2009 10:48:47

I have an acquaintance who actually changed her name based on the fact that she has Synesthesia. Hers is where her senses of hearing and touch are combined. So anytime she hears, say, the word Fur, it's like she actually feels fur on her skin. In fact it was through listening to this acquaintance's podcast on synesthesia that I came to understand a friend I know much more personally, who has both Autism and Synesthesia. But this lady changed her first name to Thea because the TH sound felt like soft feathers.

Post 11 by icequeen (move over school!) on Sunday, 08-Nov-2009 12:24:50

Hi Eleni. congratulations on finding a name that suits you! I have had several friends who've name changed for their own personal reasons. They didn't need lawyers or any online place to fill out the papers. The forms are short and gotten from city hall/county clerk office. Since it sounds like your family is not in favor of the name change, is there someone else who could see to help you fill out the papers? Since they are not lengthtly I bet even someone in the office would be willing to help you. Anyway next one is given a court date relatively quickly. The judge just wants to know that you have no criminal reasons for wanting the name change. Here in this state the forms do not cost and the court fee is 250 but wavers are granted and your inability to pay does not have to be proven with tax returns etc. I know here one can print the forms off from the county website. Good luck! I bet you could have your name change by year's end! :)

Post 12 by Eleni21 (I have proven to myself and the world that I need mental help) on Sunday, 08-Nov-2009 13:00:18

lol Right now, I'm totally broke, so can't even afford a small fee. But I'm hoping by early next year I can do it. My family's not thrilled with the idea but they're willing to help me with it. That's why we get along so well. Even if they don't fully agree with something, they'll help me with it, so long as I'm not harming myself etc, which I certainly don't want to do.

Post 13 by chelslicious (like it or not, I'm gonna say what I mean. all the time.) on Sunday, 08-Nov-2009 16:38:28

great topic Eleni; I'm wanting to change my name as well for personal reasons. I live in TX and need to look into the fees as well.

Post 14 by chelslicious (like it or not, I'm gonna say what I mean. all the time.) on Sunday, 08-Nov-2009 16:38:59

I just wanna change my last name, though. forgot to mention that previously.

Post 15 by Eleni21 (I have proven to myself and the world that I need mental help) on Sunday, 08-Nov-2009 16:42:59

I'm sure that TX has a site like NJ with good info. Best of luck to you and let us know how it goes.

Post 16 by LeoGuardian (You mean there is something outside of this room with my computer in it?) on Sunday, 08-Nov-2009 17:31:48

How do you pronounce your new name, Eleni?

Post 17 by Eleni21 (I have proven to myself and the world that I need mental help) on Sunday, 08-Nov-2009 17:37:59

El-eh-nee. the accent is on the second sylable, which sounds like the e in egg.

Post 18 by icequeen (move over school!) on Sunday, 08-Nov-2009 18:35:10

kewl Chels. Do you want to take a different last name from a part of your family you identify with, or do you want to choose one that is just something you like?

Post 19 by chelslicious (like it or not, I'm gonna say what I mean. all the time.) on Sunday, 08-Nov-2009 18:37:29

I want to take the last name of the family I identify with.

Post 20 by icequeen (move over school!) on Sunday, 08-Nov-2009 19:07:11

very kewl. let me know if you want any help finding your needed info to do that. :)

Post 21 by Eleni21 (I have proven to myself and the world that I need mental help) on Sunday, 08-Nov-2009 19:12:55

I'm so glad that people are benefitting from this post. I honestly didn't think there were any name changers on here, but apparently, I was wrong. Opa.

Post 22 by chelslicious (like it or not, I'm gonna say what I mean. all the time.) on Sunday, 08-Nov-2009 19:56:35

sure Amber or anyone else willing to help...it'd be much appreciated!! :)

Post 23 by Siriusly Severus (The ESTJ 1w9 3w4 6w7 The Taskmaste) on Tuesday, 08-Dec-2009 18:28:01

I was forced to adopt an English Name at three. Rachel has only been just an English name. All my documents says Kawing, however. However I do plan to make Rachel my official name and Disregard Kawing. I don't particularly like it.

Post 24 by Eleni21 (I have proven to myself and the world that I need mental help) on Tuesday, 28-Dec-2010 20:37:59

I'm bringing this topic back due to the fact that there is someone in NJ on here who might be able to help me. I'm also wondering about benefits like SSI, food stamps, medicaid, housing and the like. Would someone in the process of a name change have difficulty with these agencies and/or lose said benefits until things were resolved?

Post 25 by tear drop (No longer looking for a prince, merely a pauper with potential!!!!!) on Tuesday, 28-Dec-2010 23:20:44

While I don't plan to change my official name, I have been considering changing the spelling back to it's perhaps, ordinary, but appropriate/easier to mannage "Jessica."

Post 26 by turricane (happiness and change are choices ) on Wednesday, 29-Dec-2010 12:07:34

when i was young i wanted to change my name in the worst way. recently after my dad died, i thought "now is my chance. he's gone and i won't hurt anyone's feelings." so i started thinking about what i'd like to be instead of holly turri. guess what. i couldn't think of anytyhing. i wonder if i just got worn down by life, acquired more maturity or what.

Post 27 by chelslicious (like it or not, I'm gonna say what I mean. all the time.) on Sunday, 02-Jan-2011 20:58:55

I can say this: while changing my name is a neat idea, I no longer wanna do it; I guess I've grown up, as Holly said in a previous post.

Post 28 by Perestroika (Her Swissness) on Monday, 03-Jan-2011 6:30:39

I don't know why everything is so damned expenseve in the USA, probably because you're all capitalists :p

I changed my full name when I turned 18, but had been known as Louisiana Griffin by my school and friends ever since I was 13.

This is what I had to have.
1. completed form for the department of birth's deaths and marriages, stating all kinds of stuff, including reasons for the name change.
2. copies of 3 forms of identification signed by a justice of the peace. they had to include a birth certificate or citizenship certificate, passport or other form of identification containing a photo, and any number of other forms could make up the last one, including medicare card, bank cards, bills and so on, as long as it had your full name on it.
3. a cheque for $80 australian for the fee of all the checking and changing that needed to be done, more if you wanted an urgent application.

and that was it. no appointments no nothing.
As for my family, those of whom I stilll speak with call me by my birth name, but I have a little trick of simply stopping to respond to them whenever it's mentioned. I just sit quietly until they correct themselves. I utterly refuse to respond to anyone on the street who mentions my birth name and I just walk past.

Post 29 by CrystalSapphire (Uzuri uongo ndani) on Thursday, 06-Jan-2011 13:09:37

interesting..

Post 30 by Lisa's Girl forever (Help me, I'm stuck to my chair!) on Monday, 14-Feb-2011 21:50:02

i have felt like cchangeing my name. before. smiles.

Post 31 by Senior (I've now got the bronze prolific poster award! now going for the silver award!) on Wednesday, 16-Feb-2011 15:34:38

I don't see any point changing my name. I can do a lot with my name as it is without changing it legally. I can be just Senior, Wayne or Nigel, I can make it Chinese (Sen Wan Ni), I can be a wangel, a Waynderful Wangel. I can be Wayne the Brain por Brainy Waney. I can be Wayne the Warrior or Warrior Wayne. I can even be Hurricane Wayne the Warrior Senior (if I do darts or boxing). I can be Senior the Superior. I can be King Wayne the 1st.

And remind me... whose world is this?

Post 32 by squidwardqtentacles (I just keep on posting!) on Wednesday, 16-Feb-2011 17:51:47

Keep in mind if you change your name you'll probably have to get used to a new social security number when you apply for jobs or what have you. That's part of the reason I didn't change my surname when I married.

Post 33 by LeoGuardian (You mean there is something outside of this room with my computer in it?) on Wednesday, 16-Feb-2011 18:04:32

On marriage, you don't have to change your social security number: it just gets attached to the new name. I thought name change was the same. Generally social security numbers are numbered based on location and time of birth.

Post 34 by Eleni21 (I have proven to myself and the world that I need mental help) on Wednesday, 16-Feb-2011 20:57:51

From all that I've read, your social security number stays the same after a name change.